How would You classify yourself? Stop and think about that for just a minute
before answering. Would you begin by putting
yourself in a category, one of those “I am this type of person”? Or would you ponder on the “How” part? Let’s talk about that for just a moment, then
we’ll get into the juicy part of this post.
Some people are quick to judge, while some are rather slow, and then
there are those that believe they do not judge others. So for now we have three types of
people. What should we label them? For arguments sake let’s label them as
follows; “Quick”, “Slow”, and “Forgiving”.
The “Quick” person can usually pin-point a person’s persona in less than
a minute. The “Slow” person can usually
come up with a solution within five minutes.
The “Forgiving” person will change their opinion several times during
this process. The point in which we
begin to pass judgement onto others (or Forgive), is when we first come into
contact them. Whether that being in
person or when we first learn about their existence. It is a natural thing to do, and we do so in
the most selfish way. Speaking of
selfish, have you placed Yourself into one of these three types? If you hadn’t, I bet a part of your mind just
started the process when I asked you that question. We do this in a manner of self-protection. When we first meet someone, we tend to ask
ourselves “Is this person a threat?”.
Most of us don’t realize we are doing it. We’ve done it so many times that it has
become second nature or an instinct if you will. Now stop and think about the first question I
asked you.
For as long as I can remember I have put people into two
categories, “Surviving” and “Living”. It
usually took a day or two to place them into one or the other. Now some people got shoved into one of them
within seconds of me meeting them. Once
I placed them there, they usually stayed there.
I never changed my view of them in that manner (until recently). Now that’s not to say that I didn’t change my
opinion of what type of person they became, to me. For example; When I first met (we’ll call him…)
Metro. Metro and I met over a common
interest. What that interest is, is not
important but the moment is. In that
moment I had placed Metro into the Friendly person category, and Metro had
placed me into the Dangerous person category.
He judged me on my appearance (Bald head, squinty eyes, heavy metal
t-shirt). To him, he thought that I was
going to be trouble, since I was lingering around in his domain. I judged him on how he was with the other
people around us (Kind and approachable).
When the moment came that we would interact, he approached me with
caution and I him with a question. We
spoke for several minutes, and would eventually become friends. Metro was put into the “Living” category by
the time we concluded our first meeting.
To me, he seemed to be a guy that was high on life and living his
dream. I would later learn that, that
was not the case. He remained in that
category regardless. Now my opinion of
Metro has changed from when I first met him.
I still think of Metro as a friendly guy, but I have added several more
categories to his personality as well, hell I’ve even taken him out of a
few. Now over the years Metro’s life has
changed, as all of our lives do. He
would say that he is just doing enough to get by. I would say he is living his life.
“Surviving” versus “Living”.
To me, a person who was doing just enough to get by was “Surviving”,
while the person who was doing the best that they could was “Living”. Try this on for size. Imagine a person who is living in a low
income apartment, no job, no apparent ambition in life to change their circumstances. That person is in the “Surviving”
category. Now imagine a person who is
living in a two-story house, has a career, and the apparent drive to obtain
what they want. That person is in the “Living”
category. Is that a fair assumption to
make? Like I said before, for a long
time I thought so. Based on that, what
category would you place yourself in?
If you were to ask me a year ago, I would say that I was in
the “Surviving” category. I never took
the chance to change my life for the better.
I just went with the flow. The
average dip-shit if you get my meaning.
I have done a lot of different things in my life as I’m sure most of us
have. My circumstances have changed from
one end of the financial spectrum to the other and back again more than a dozen
times. I’m not saying that I’ve ever
been filthy rich, but I have been financially secure for a time. I had the money to pay the bills and do the
things that I’ve wanted to do. I have even
been so poor that I was living on the streets.
Now most of my life was spent somewhere in between. Still I would say that I was “Surviving”,
because my circumstances would change me, but I would do very little to change
my circumstances. Does that make sense? As you are reading this, are you making any
connections?
If you were to ask me what category do I think I am in now,
I would say neither or both.
Confused? Let me explain. Once I was diagnosed with cancer, I really
began to think about my life. Now don’t
start thinking, oh shit here we go on the “Why did this shit have to happen to
me?”, “I’m doomed!”, or “Poor me!” I don’t
think that way. I started thinking about
those two categories and why did it matter to me which category any of us were
in. What I have come up with so far is,
it shouldn’t matter. Try to swallow this
pill. Is a Cancer patient living their life
or surviving it? What about those people
that are helping the Cancer patient? I’m
not talking about the Doctors, Nurses, or Specialists. I’m talking about the Family and
Friends. Is the latter helping the
patient survive, or is the patient helping the others to live? I would say that they are helping each other
with both. Need a little more explanation
there my friend? Well follow me down
this path; The following two people I have known for most of my life, keep in
mind as you follow this scenario that we are going with the two categories of “Surviving”
and “Living”. The one in the “Living”
category (We’ll call...) Anakin. The one
in the “Surviving” category (We’ll call…) Padme. Now Anakin had been going down a dark and
twisted path in life. He thought he was
living his life to the fullest by living in the moment. He eventually lost everything he thought he
was living for. Anakin spent several
years in that dark place, before coming to terms with his life and deciding to
change it for the better. He would one
day walk down a lighter path in life, but not without any help. Padme would be the one to help Anakin on this
journey. She would give up everything
she knew to do so. Padme would encourage
Anakin to strive for the best, by being his foundation. Anakin wanted the best for Padme and would do
anything to see her happy once more.
Anakin knew that the constant support from her was beginning to ware on
her. This would make him fight harder,
and eventually succeed. Padme could see
the fight in Anakin and would try even harder to be the stability he
needed. In short my friends, Anakin
would change his life for the better only because Padme would remain the
constant in his life. Padme would live
her life only to help Anakin survive his.
You see one can’t life without the other. To survive you have to live, and vice
versa. Sorry for the Star Wars reference
there… OK I’m not but maybe you got the point.
Today I look at life without those two categories to base
people on. I am living my life and
surviving it at the same time. When I
look at others now, I realize that there was never a possibility for me to even
come close to comprehending if they were living or surviving life simply based on
my point of view. It’s funny how things
can change your perspective on life. It
took Cancer for me to stop and think about how I look at other people and how
life is lived and survived. What a
difference a tiny ass cell can make. So
when you hear that phrase, “Even the smallest things can make a big difference.”
You might want to pay attention just a little bit.
So if you’re still reading this post, I bet you are
wondering if we are ever going to get to the juicy part? Well my friends here we go. Now don’t get all judgmental on my ass
here. This part is more for you than for
me. Keep in mind that I do read all
comments and replies to these posts and that others may read them as well. So without further ado, it’s time to get those
undies all twisted up and let the good times roll… or whatever floats your damn
boat.
In this post I asked you some questions. Remember I asked you as well to stop and
think about it at the beginning. I’m
hoping that you placed yourself in a category (not the “Surviving” or “Living”
ones) but rather the judgmental ones.
Which judgmental type are you?
Now be honest with yourself and then lie! In your comments or replies, tell us which
one you believe yourself to be or at least what you want us to believe. Don’t worry, we won’t judge you too
much. We all have a thought of who we
think we are and that that person is different (in a way) than the person
others think we are. If you don’t feel
up to the task, ask yourself this; “Would it matter if they knew or not?”
That my friends could begin a very juicy conversation, or at
least earn a couple likes on Facebook.
So hopefully you enjoyed this post or at least it gave you something to
think about. Remember… “The Force will
be with you, Always” – Ha! I did it again.